If you think the worst thing that can happen while skiing is trying not to scream while the ski patrol figures out why your leg’s bending that way, we have a lot to teach you about skiing. Spoiler: mountains can cook and kill people. Don’t say this podcast doesn’t teach you things. On today’s episode: you will learn why Frankenstein was more graceful on stolen corpse feet than you are in snowboots; you’ll learn why d...

The Yukon River is famous for its remoteness and scenic vistas and history, where very little may seem to happen – but in 1906, one man’s lack of situational awareness and fine-motor skills created the greatest, cattle-based pyrotechnics display the world had ever seen. On today’s episode: you will see how miners and prostitutes used to travel in style in the far sub-Arctic North; you will hear about what may be the ...

You ever go on a field trip at school and every time you look over your shoulder, there’s a teacher or chaperone giving you the stink eye? Well try to imagine a field trip where you look up and all your old relatives are waving you into a tunnel of white light. On today’s very special milestone 100th Episode: you’ll hear about my school trip to a French strip club; you would learn about a man of God who unintentional...

BEFORE WE BEGIN – the best way to enjoy today's stupidity is in the form of video, which as a special thank you to all of you for another great year, I have edited together and made FREE at patreon.com/funeralkazoo . No strings attached. Just a gift to you all, with hopes for happy holidays and a fantastic new year.  ––––– You ever watch a big, blockbuster sci-fi action adventure movie that turns out to be so bereft ...

Nothing says ‘fun afternoon’ quite like adding cutlery to your feet, bruising most of your body, and then going for a nice swim. And to clarify, when I say nothing, I mean because that’s not something that anyone has ever said before. On today’s episode:  we’ll see how the former digs of axe murderers and corpse thieves and child labour body pits became one of the most beautiful green spaces in London; we’ll learn wh...

The average lake around the world is about the size of a large parking lot – the kind of thing you might try to skip a stone across. The current World Record for stone skipping is 88 skips. If you were to skip a stone across the lake we’re visiting today, it would have to beat that number by about 406, 912 and it would be bouncing across the water for about three hours. On today’s episode: You’ll learn about the most...

To begin today’s tale, allow me to share a translation of an ancient Chinese joke: Three men were looking at the clouds. One points to a cloud and says, that cloud is shaped like a horse. Another points to a cloud and says, that one is shaped like a whale. The third man points to a mushroom-shaped cloud, and everyone dies. On today’s episode: you’ll find out just how badly ancient China wanted nothing to do with you;...

Take the most frightening death you can imagine, now double it. Then double it again. And then add fire. This is our Halloween episode, and by the time we’re done, your favourite horror movie will have all the impact of a baby food commercial. I’m not saying you’ll never sleep again, but I’m not not saying it. I am apologizing in advance, and I remind you that a Doomsday barf bag is only an email away. Back when we d...

The most unusual thing about today’s story is that almost everyone is going to bruise their lungs. For your sake, I hope it’s from laughing. Not everyone will be so lucky. On today’s episode: you’ll hear about the one part of your body I want you to consider more worthy of fiddling with than your genitals; if you’re a stickler for building codes, we’re going to take you on a beautiful, potentially one-way hike to see...

We’ve done episodes where people lose their teeth. We’ve done episodes where have them melted out of their heads, or frisbeed out by debris, or punched out by bulls, or even blown out of their heads by lightning. But we’ve never done an episode where the most horrifying thing that happens is you maybe get something stuck in them. On this episode: we’ll take off on one of the least enviable flights in history – which ...

It’s rare for us to have an episode with so many feces mentioned right off the top, but do not worry, refreshments will be served. On this episode: we’re doing another one-of-a-kind episode here, and I’ll explain the rules as get into it, but for all those listeners who love our more unhygienic content, have we got a treat for you. We’re talking about the only consumer product you can blow out your nose while friends...

As a lifelong, dyed in the wool, comic book enthusiast, it behooves me with the recent release of the new James Gunn Superman movie to share this short Patreon segment pulled from our recent Greensburg Tornado Disaster of 2007 episode.  Back in 1938, to his creators, Kansas represented the humble origins and strong ethics we associate with the Superman we know today. They believed that no other State would have produ...

Today, we will be spending the day on board a whole bunch of ships sharing a long and storied heritage. Sadly, we’re going to spend most of our time on the one that crew members called “The Mobile Chernobyl” . On today’s episode: we’ll see what it feels like to survive something that peeled through six inch steel plates like taffy; in our safety segment, you’ll hear the first use of the term “enriddlement”; and befor...

Hello, and welcome to the inglorious return of Doomsday: History’s Most Dangerous Mailbag Minisode! We’ve seen an awful lot of $@!# across time and space and it’s only natural that you would have questions – so here is your chance hear them answered. Maybe learn something a little gross, maybe a little interesting. This is my chance to publicly answer some of the friendly, odd and occasionally gross questions that fe...

A wind could remove your hat. A stronger wind might steal your lawn furniture. The kind of wind we’re talking about today renovated Pre-War and Mid-Century Midwestern homes into more “open concept” dwellings. On today’s episode: we’re going to take a look at what happens when you’re visited by a storm so powerful, they invent a new scale just to define it; we’ll see what it feels like to have your house reduced to th...

We’ve been a lot of places together on this show. I’m trying to think of the weirdest. Nuclear reactors, insane asylums, the mouths of volcanoes; but now, by fan request, it’s finally time that we visit our strangest location yet: a restaurant. And before we begin – IHOP you survive the experience! On today’s episode: we’re visiting an American institution, recognized around the world for it’s bizarre duality as a ma...

You know how when you have a good idea, you get a little lightbulb over your head? What if you had a bad idea, and a million cubic feet of rock collapsed on you. On today’s episode:  why the tourist bureau for today’s story drink so much; how the people in today’s episode work with equipment that would rattle an melt your skull off and sometimes want to cry and eat each other; and why the phrase “well, I’m glad that’...

Today, we’re going to witness a light so bright it would instantaneously and irreversibly turn your corneas into charcoal, and oddly, it’s the least dangerous thing about our story. On today’s episode:  why the tourist bureau for today’s story drink so much; how the people in today’s episode work with equipment that would rattle an melt your skull off and sometimes want to cry and eat each other; and why the phrase “...

We’ve had a lot of episodes underground, and none of them have been underwhelming. In fact, if you’re not fans of claustrophobia, choking, burning, or being trampled, today’s episode may be a little overwhelming. On today’s episode:  we will discuss how some of the richest men in America created a boiling, black mountain of crap as powerful as a small nuclear blast; we will – for only the second time in the show’s hi...

We all complain about commutes. We all think we have it pretty bad. But unless your commute includes choking on toxic fumes, or being claustrophobically trampled in the dark while on fire, prepare to eat your feelings. On today’s episode:  we learn what makes the world capital of mud farts so fascinating; we’ll discover why Soviet utilities designed for the utilitarian benefit of the masses are so flammable; and I’ll...

Ever have a day at work so bad you wanted to climb, jump, or get sucked out a window? On today’s episode: we answer the question, is 2025 in fact as awful a time to fly as it looks; we’ll find out why you’ve never seen 400 mph wind exfoliation spa before; and we’ll compare a commercial airliner to the Titan Submersible that imploded not that long ago. And because you are listening to this as a Patreon supporter, you ...

What’s the worst thing you ever saw at a sports game? Someone throw a battery at a Make-a-Wish kid? Sure, if you’re from Philly, but what if you were from California. On today’s episode: we’ll talk about zombies and crucifictions and collapsing buildings before we even get into it; we’re going to watch the shortest baseball game of all time; and we’re going to cut off one of your limbs in one of the more claustrophob...

Do you know the difference between your guts and balloon animals? Organs are ever-so slightly more flame resistant! On today’s episode: you’ll learn how to squeeze every penny out of a beloved animal corpse; I’ll accidentally teach you why fire is the best way to get rid of leaves, or a body; and you’ll learn the surprisingly simple thing you should do if you found yourself full-bodied origamied into debris. And if y...

We’re going to hell! Well, not hell exactly. We’re going to rural Illinois, but for the purposes of this introduction, we are going to be spending time today in hell.   On today’s episode:  you’re going to learn why fourth graders make such poor employees; you’ll learn how to properly panic like a professional; and you will learn how to tell people to “get out” using nothing but a shotgun and morse code. And if you w...

Do you like fire but hate airports? Have we got the episode for you. On today’s episode: we’ll be pulling off the front of our skulls and spending some time fingering our limbic systems; we’ll learn why not all fire rescue services are created equal; and we’ll find out how hot it needs to be for your skin to melt off. And if you had beenlistening to this as a Patreon supporter, you get to enjoy an additional 8 minute...

Let's all blow our sad kazoos in honour of a milestone I didn't see coming. FIVE YEARS we've been doing this, and I know a lot of people were never able to make their way through the whole back catalogue, and for good reason. So I sat down and did the math: We've shared 3,489 minutes together! That's just episode time. That’s just over 58 hours of listening to me trying to make you throw up but then earning your resp...

Hellooo! And welcome to a very special, extra girthy Orthodox Christmas Disastersode! It is a miracle this happened. I was deathly ill with a dying dog for eight magic days this holiday, and the master file was irretrievably destroyed mere days ago, and so the Christmasode becomes a New Years’ flavoured Orthodox Christmasode. This episode fulfills the wishes of more listeners than any other episode before. Together w...

We’ve made a lot of fun of meteorologists on this show. Nope, that’s it, that’s the whole intro. On this episode: you’ll hear about the biggest meteorological blunder in US history that went on to change US history by killing a major American city; you’ll hear the absolute saddest story about orphans of all time; and you’ll learn about the worst cadaver recovery and fatality management in the show’s history. Also, if...

Hello! And welcome to this very brief end-of-year update of Doomsday: History’s Most Dangerous podcast! Together we rediscover some of the most traumatic, bizarre and awe-inspiring but largely unheard-of or forgotten disasters from throughout human history and around the world. Let me begin today’s exciting episode by explaining the next episode will be late but I wanted to use this opportunity to quickly get you sal...

If you’re like me, when it comes to sporting events, the only thing coming out of the stands should be cheers and chants, and the only thing leaving the field should be the occasional ball or a t-shirt fired from a canon. We’ll come back to that. On this episode: you’ll find out which sports fans tried to kill Santa Claus; we’ll find out what stadium security personnel and Acorn Cop have in common; and we’ll meet the...